7 Panels I Should Have Submitted For LeakyCon 2016

I waited for months for the opportunity to submit panel proposals for presentation at this year’s LeakyCon. And then when it finally came… I blanked. I knew I wanted to do a Wizard Rock-focused panel, and if no one had organized it yet, I wanted there to be a genderqueer meetup panel. Besides a hastily thought of My Immortal panel (and I am so pumped that Tianna is doing a panel on both My Immortal and Beowulf), I just couldn’t summon up any more ideas. I guessed I just didn’t have that much to say, or that I actually didn’t have that many opinions. It is at this point that you should be laughing.

Within days, maybe even hours of the deadline passing, a great panel idea came to me. Then another. And another. Some of these, I suddenly remembered, were panels I’d wanted to do ever since my very first LeakyCon and being sad these subjects weren’t represented. So here’s a list in no particular order of 7 panels I have belatedly realized I should have submitted. I’m doing this partially in the hopes that it will make for enjoyable Content, and partially to get me closer to meeting this week’s article goal, but mostly so I’ll have this handy reference if the opportunity ever affords itself again.

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LeakyCon Reflections: General Musings

It’s been just about a week, so the time for reflections on LeakyCon Portland is drawing to a close. Soon will be the time to look forward to LeakyCon London, LeakyCon 2014, or Wrockstock Wreborn or whatever its called. But for now, indulge me in one last look back at LeakyCon, as I go over my general thoughts and experiences of the con.

Special Events: Over the past decade, these have become the bread and butter of cons, but in the past couple years they have skewed more and more towards things that don’t interest me, like jam-packed Starkid concerts, the Lizzie Bennet Whatevers, or the increasingly ridiculous lines for autographs and pictures. Now, a lot of this is because of the ending of the series and the skewing of LeakyCon towards multi-fandom, so stuff like the Mina Lima panel is becoming increasingly rare. And hey, that’s fine – I totally get the importance of appealing to your user base, and changing with the times. It just means that I can’t comment on most of the big headlining events.

I did attend the Fittie 5k however, and that was a lot of fun. For one thing, the route was beautiful, offering a taste of everything Portland has to offer – trees, water, running both on and UNDER bridges – it was also just generally well-organized, with the volunteers cheering your finishing of the route being a particularly nice touch. I would very much like to see this become a Leaky tradition.

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Top 10 Things That Didn’t Make Sense at LeakyCon Portland

While on the whole I did enjoy LeakyCon Portland, and the same seems to be true for most people, there were some things at LeakyCon that just didn’t… quite… make sense. For example:

10. Why were lines for overpriced bland con food so long when there was a Burgerville, a Denny’s, and a Red Robin right fucking there?

This truly baffled me. While I’m happy that more people were introduced to the deliciousness that is Burgerville (I myself used the ludicrous amount of ad revenue I get from running this site to get a special franchise installed near my Moonbase On The Moon), and it was a very popular joint, the lines for an 8 dollar wrap that could be finished off in about four bites were so long, at one point they threatened to overtake the Starkid signing line! I mean, I know that convenience is nice, but in the time it took to stand in those lines you could have easily walked the two blocks to Burgerville and back.

9. Why did people only start making a big deal about how the kid from Iron Man 3 was there afterwards?

So there I am, sitting at home and scrawling through the leakycon tag on tumblr, when I come across all these photos of this vaguely familiar kid – I remembered briefly interacting with him at the con. And then I realized it was the kid from Iron Man 3. And no one was talking about it, tumblring about it, tweeting about it, whatever, during the con at all! Now, while this is probably a good thing, because it decreased the likelihood of the poor guy getting Starkid-style swamped, someone could have at least told me! Humph.

8. Who the fuck is Anthony Rapp?

Okay yes he did a singy acty thing once. Woo. What do you mean Rent is important? Of course it’s important – moonbases aren’t cheap, you know! Look, if he wasn’t in a movie, I really don’t think we should care. Obvious exceptions can be made for the Starkids, but that guy didn’t look nearly enough like Darren Criss for me to care. Besides, I never once heard him rapping, which is yet another example of the now-famous LeakyCon penchant for blatant false advertising (I’m looking at you, “Marginalization in Harry Potter” panel – there was not a single mention of margarine, butter, or other such delicious fat deposits to spread on your toast). And worst of all, this guy kept calling the Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube a “companion cube” – IT DIDN’T HAVE HEARTS ON IT! IT’S NOT A COMPANION CUBE! Sheesh. Some people.

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LeakyCon Reflections: Rock Night 2

MURICAFirst of all, HAPPY MURICA TO ALL MURICANS.

Now that that’s out of the way, my thoughts on the second night of rock at Leaky! Due to the Team Quiz running super long, I ended up missing the entirety of the first two acts, though I heard positive things about them, especially Rae Sterling. Of course, I’ve also heard positive things about myself, so you really can’t hold much stock in vague positive opinions from the ethereal “other”. Still, it seems like a good time was had by all, or at least, by most. By some.

At the very least, I can safely say that at least one person enjoyed themselves. That one person would probably be Justin, because as I’ve stated before, that fucker always seems like he’s smiling and enjoying himself, in blatant disregard of all the many reasons we have to despair of this world. What an asshole.

But speaking of which, the first set I saw the (near) entirety of was Justin Finch-Fletchley and the Sugar Quills, and it was nothing short of excellent. Now, according to my research, this opinion puts me in the minority (though the true minority seems to be having an opinion at all about the rock nights at Leaky) – some samples of what tumblr has to say about Justin’s set: “Justin Finch-Fletchley and the Quills were lame”, “Oh man, watching this set was torturous”, and “Justin Finch-Fletchley and the Sugar Quills are the worst band in the history of the universe. I HATE their lead guy.”

I would actually put it as my third favorite set of the weekend – Justin is like Whompy in that whatever you might say about their voices or instrumental abilities (things I’ve never had a problem with but I can see how others do), you cannot deny that they are natural performers, and know how to put on a damn fine show. Justin was in top form, smiling and joking his way through the whole set, with Steph on bass and Joe DeGeorge absolutely killing it with the saxophone. The live sax throughout the set alone made it a must-see show, and Joe’s talent on the sax has really improved over the years – it’s now miles ahead from the somewhat kazoo-sounding recordings on “My Wizard Scar Still Burns For You” “Save Ginny Weasley from Dean Thomas”.

The whole band seemed to be having fun, including one moment when Joe just walked over to Justin and starting blaring sax directly into Justin’s ear. This meant that suddenly we weren’t hearing anything over on Joe’s end, but it made for quite the amusing spectacle. Also, special mention must be made of Justin’s show-opening rendition of “Honeydukes” – that is a fairly long song, and the live version stretched it out even more, but the whole thing just worked, with spikes of energy, restful lulls, musical tangents, and it all coming back to one of the catchiest choruses in all of wizard rock.

I won’t deny that the crowd was not super-enthused, and I get it – Justin is not the most popular band, and he doesn’t have a show-stoppingly beautiful voice like Christian or some of the MoM boys. But he brings an undeniable presence to his performances, and he just seems so happy to be up there, and gives everything he has into each show. It’s that sincere enthusiasm that made this such a fun set, and I pity anyone who couldn’t get some enjoyment from it.

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Tweets from LeakyCon

This is pretty self explanatory – while hopefully most of you were already able to “enjoy” my tweets from LeakyCon Portland, I wish to collate them all, here and now, for easy reference later. Scrolling back through twitter feeds is such a pain in the butt, and archival sites are often unreliable, and I wish I’d done something like this after WrockStock 4, so here we go!

Arrived two hours early for reg, ended up just walking straight up to the booth and getting my swag – WORST. LINECON. EVER. 😦 #leakycon

Hey – some important @leakycon info – the info about your trimet ticket is slightly wrong – you DO need to present your ticket when boarding the bus, but not on the max. So don’t try to just walk on the bus, the drivers dont like that. #leakycon

Also, be warned that theres also the International Conference of Old People here in the OCC – try not to talk about “the internet” #leakycon

Wait, Leakycon is supporting PETA? Really?? #butwhy #petaisliketheworstanimalrightsorginazationever #theyoperatekillshelters

Its nice to see that Leakycon messenger bags only come in blue or green – throwing support behind the *correct* houses for once.

#Ways2GetHighAtLeakycon: Wear old-school 3D glasses and stare at the carpet – its trippy as FUCK #leakycon

Oh my God I think I just saw a NERD. #ohshit #hideyourkindle #hideyourwifi #leakycon

Dear Lord, there’s at least THREE of them #leakycon

THEY’RE HUNTING IN PACKS #leakycon #sendhelp

NERDS

NERDS EVERYWHERE

HELLLLLLLLP

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LeakyCon Reflections: Rock Night 1

[Thank you for visiting The Wrock Snob and reading this article! I’d love for you to jump right into the reviewy goodness, but first there is some unfortunate business to take care of. It is not in my nature to tell you specifically what or what not to buy and who to support – I tell you what I thought about an album, and if my tastes seem to align with yours, you might want to heed my suggestions. However, I must take this time to personally exhort that you do not monetarily support the bands The Remus Lupins or Ministry of Magic. The full reasons are unsettling and possibly triggering, so please proceed with caution, but if you want the full details click here. Simply put, it has been revealed that certain member/s of both bands did destructive, upsetting, and highly problematic things. While I can see the value of reviewing art no matter what the artist did on a grand society-level scale, I cannot morally allow myself to condone the financial support of these monsters, nonetheless exhorting people to do so. Now it is entirely possible this copypasta’d retroactive warning was placed on a negative review, making this sidebar somewhat moot, but I still feel it necessary to make these matters clear. Again, for full details and rumination click here, otherwise, please enjoy the article.]

Hey all! I’m back from my trip to Portland and am happily ensconced back in my Moonbase On The Moon. I’m going to do a series of shorter articles about my LeakyCon experience, starting with my thoughts on the performances at Night One of Leaky Rock. Just a couple heads-up – I’m only going to be reviewing the acts of wizard rockers/people connected to wizard rock, mostly for the simple fact that due to various circumstances I was late to both Rock Nights and ended up missing the opening acts, which were not made up of wrockers/former wrockers, so if you really were waiting on the edge of your seat to hear what I thought of Kirstyn Hippe or Rae Sterling, I’m afraid you’re gonna be disappointed. Also, I did spend my time actively trying to enjoy the music, and not writing down band order or setlists, so some minor details might be off, and I apologize for that.

Anywho – Tonks and the Aurors! Steph put on a damn good show, playing her classics – “Charlie Weasley”, “I’m An Auror”, “We Are Magic”, as well as a song from her West Wing side project. I would have loved to see her play my personal favorite song of hers, “Lost”, but it’s a song that didn’t seem to get much attention aside from my slavish replays on iTunes, and “Charlie Weasley” is a damn fun song to rock out to with other people. I’ve said it before on twitter, but “Charlie Weasley” is my personal vote for the most righteously fun break-up song in wizard rock, in the same vein of such classics of the genre like They Might Be Giant’s “Pet Name”.

It was nice to see Alex Carpenter on bass, though it cemented my new favorite activity of the con being watching Alex get distracted by shiny things. During the somewhat lackluster (though well-written) Opening Ceremonies skit, Alex played the role of the 11th Doctor, and was just kind of… wandering around on stage, back and forth behind everyone. Then during Steph’s set, a wayward piece of confetti end up slowly falling down from the rafters near Alex, and there was this heart-stoppingly hilarious moment, when Alex just turned his entire being to quizzically follow the trajectory of this single tiny piece of paper, still playing bass all the while.

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Top 10 Things I Am Looking Forward To At LeakyCon Portland

Hey, wizard peeps. So, probably not as much in-depth content next week, as I will be spending the latter half of the weekend attending LeakyCon Portland (trekking all the way from my moonbase on the moon to attend, no less). There will still be a Snobby Sundays article over on the ‘pedia, and next week will be post-Leaky coverage. After that I will continue my usual shouting into the void (with occasional commentary by Russ/Brad/Sam).

Anyways, the LeakyCon Portland schedule was (finally) released recently, so here’s the 10 things I am most looking forward to.

10. The 5k Run/Walk

Now, while I will not be officially attending this event, I will be renting a Vespa (much more Portland than a Segway) and riding along behind the mass of jogging nerds with my roommate’s traditional Hungarian whip (and possibly his giant jar of paprika as well), making sure everyone steps lively. Also, a heads up for anyone who wishes to attend this event but ends up becoming institutionalized between their plane touching down and Thursday morning, the Psych Wards in the city each have an average hallway length of 75 meters, meaning that with only 20 laps you can have your own First Annual 3k Walk/Walk (running is not permitted on the ward)!

9. The LGBT Meetup

This is a worthy subject for a panel/meetup, and is sure to be a great event. But hey, for those planning to attend, did you know that those pansies at the Slash Meetup are having their event at the exact same time, probably in an attempt to siphon attendees away from your meetup? I think you should totally instigate a full-scale invasion of their meetup in retaliation.

8. The Slash Meetup

This is a worthy subject for a panel/meetup, and is sure to be a great event. But hey, for those planning to attend, did you know that those assholes at the LGBT Meetup are having their event at the exact same time, probably in an attempt to siphon attendees away from your meetup? I think you should totally instigate a full-scale invasion of their meetup in retaliation.

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Top 10 Worst Things About LeakyCon

So, remember that time I didn’t go to Infinitus, yet I bitched about it anyway? This is like that, except I actually attended THIS con (ostensibly)!

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SnobCon 2011

BIG NEWS, FOLKS!

THE WROCK SNOB IS NOW RUNNING LEAKYCON 2011!  HIT THE JUMP TO SEE THE SPECTACULAR NEW CHANGES ON THE HORIZON!

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Wizard Rock Conventions – Pros and Cons

*GASP* An update that is not at the very end of the day and is actually the next day for East Coasters?  What is happening to the world?!?!  Though, to be honest, this is a list update instead of an Extended Thoughts, but fuck you, it’s my blog, at least it’s two on-time updates in a row, and sometimes you need some humour for your Wednesday (especially if it’s a Wednesday when a Twilight movie comes out).  So, today I’m doing things a little differently – this list is in response to this week’s Question Tuesday over at the ‘Pedia – the question being “What’s your favorite thing about cons?”  Of course, me being the negative-purely-for-the-sake-of-being-negative-because-I-really-don’t-like-wizard-rock person that I am, I had to also include a con for every pro I listed.  So, without further ado, my list of the pros and cons of attending a Wizard Rock/Harry Potter convention!

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